Ben Anderson's Stuff

My chat with Microsoft Help

Rep: Hello and welcome to Microsoft help I'm XYZ, how may I help you?
Me: Yes hello. I am trying to Install Windows Home Server 2011 on a new server as the old one has broken down and is no longer usable. However when I type in the CD Key it says that it is invalid.
Rep: Okay that's not a problem sir. Do you have the product ID with you?
Me: No I only have the CD Key and it says its invalid.
Rep: Not a problem sir, what version of Windows are you trying to activate?
Me: Home Server 2011
Rep: *Typing sounds*
Rep: Is it Windows XP, Windows 7 or Windows 8?
Me: No, its Windows Home Server 2011
Rep: Okay sir.
Rep: *typing sounds*
Rep: Is that Server 2003 or 2008?
Me: Windows Home Server 2011
 It was at this point I knew I was dealing with a moron. He still didn't fix my problem after 15 minutes.

How to add a RAID array to a computer:
Step 1. Install hard disks
Step 2. Activate RAID.
Step 3. Boot Windows.
Step 4. Watch Windows Crash because it doesn’t understand that its in RAID.
Step 5. Flip ALL the tables.
Step 6. Drink Pepsi.
Step 7. ???
You now have a RAID array.

I attempted to get Windows 8 on a HP TX 2000 computer. Do not try and put Windows 8 on a HP TX 2000 computer.

After browsing tumblr and doing fuck loads of other things, it now managed to reach 2%!

OH MY!

|:

WHY DID I MAKE THIS I HAVE NO IDEA.

Oh yeah, geek-factor.

As much as Microsoft claim that new versions of Office have significant enhancements, improvements and new features, I have yet to actually notice any difference since Office 2000, apart from the UI designers turning the GUI into a contrived mess of buttons, gradient fills and “Ribbons”.

Feel free to quote me on that.

I bought this old computer for a mere £30 to use as a classic Gaming Rig!

No, you have not gone blind, that sticker on the front does indeed say “designed for Windows 95”. 256MB of RAM, 8GB Hard Disk, 200MHz Pentium Processor (yes, 200MHz ), and a Matrox Mystique 2D Graphics Card (no 3D acceleration).

I cannot wait to play the 7th guest and day of the tentacle on this bad boy!

And, no, I’m not an idiot. Windows 98SE is getting installed ASAP.

Microsoft Completely missed the mark with Windows 8.

But when it comes to Nokia and Windows Phone, I just can’t help but want one.

I’m more than tempted to ditch my iPhone 4 when the contract is finished and buy a Nokia Lumia 900 when they’re released. This is coming from a guy with every Apple device under the sun, I remind you.

OH WINDOWS :D

After two fucking hours, I finally manage to install SQL Server Management Studio!

*clicks its icon*

“Package ‘Microsoft SQL Management Studio Package’ failed to load.”

*clicks okay*

“Package ‘Microsoft SQL Management Studio Package’ failed to load.”

*clicks okay*

Management Studio Freezes

…

Management Studio Crashes

…